I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
