i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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