I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
too bad you live with your parents still
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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