How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
