He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Who died my cat blue again?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
