David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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