i don't like sucking hair
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
