So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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