It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
