there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
