I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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