Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
