oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
