dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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