That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i was born a porn star she said
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
this boner is exhausting
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
try to milk me bitch
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