The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
