so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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