When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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