'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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