Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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