I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
