I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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