Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize
