Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Randomize
