I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
We're facebook friends in real life
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
