Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize
