honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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