R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
