Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
