Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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