I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
