chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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