My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
