so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
