kristin has been a bad kristin
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
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