I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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