We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
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