Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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