Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
