I just cut my nipple shaving
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Randomize