Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize