Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
