this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
don't judge my taste in strippers
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
