You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
