I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
