I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
