Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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