if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
