she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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