There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
